Today is Thanksgiving. A day to remember what and, more importantly, who we’re thankful for. A day to watch Santa welcome in Christmas alongside giant balloons and Broadway dancers in New York city. A day to gorge ourselves into a turkey-induced sleep coma. All of which I will take part in.
One thing I love about Thanksgiving is how my kids have started to make their own memories. Audrey loves to wake up early and watch the parade with me. She never eats breakfast because she wants to have that much more room in her belly for turkey and mashed potatoes. Austen will sleep in, but will be 100% focused on family and potatoes once he is awake. Autumn has already placed her hot chocolate order so she can sip along with me on the couch before everyone else is up.
My kids have great relationships and friendships with each other. Of course they have their moments where they fight, disagree, argue. In fact, sometimes it feels like that’s the norm. It’s not, but when they’re all at each other, because they out number us parents 2 to 1, it’s a lot. But at the end of the day they love each other and know how to show it. In fact, they have started telling each other “I love you.”
I don’t know about you, but when I was a kid, I NEVER said that to my siblings. Of course I loved them. I still do. But the fighting between me and my younger sister was more present than it wasn’t. I remember my mom sometimes crying over us because we fought so much. I never would’ve imagined how my relationship with my sister would turn out as it has.
Michelle, my two-year younger sister, is now one of my best friends. She loves my kids the way I love my kids. She supports me, loves me, and is always available if I need her. Michelle has a lot going on in her own life. She is a single mom of two kids and works in the legal department for one of the countries largest companies. She is strong, courageous, brave, and someone I would put on a pedestal. Yes, my sister IS better than your sister.
Me, my mom, and my sister during our annual trip to Leavenworth in 2006
But what I love most about my sister is that she is my sister. We will always have each other and for that I am thankful. We’ve gone through a lot together in the last few years, but we have a stronger relationship, friendship, than I could have ever dreamed. Michelle, I want you to know just how much I love you and how much I cherish our friendship. This year at Thanksgiving I am thankful for you!
There is typically one day out of my week that I am home by myself. When all the kids go to school and I have the day off work. Today is that day. As I was doing my weekly decluttering and cleaning of my kids’ rooms, I couldn’t stop the tears that have been flowing since yesterday.
Yesterday, at about this time, a friend of mine received the call that no mother ever wants to hear.
Your son has been in an accident and airlifted to the hospital.
At that moment, the world stops. Nothing else matters.
He was on his way to school. And I can’t stop thinking about what the morning before the accident was like. Did he eat his breakfast with his brother and sister like my kids do? Did he leave a mess in his room like mine son does? Did he kiss his mother good-bye or was everyone in a hurry, like my family?
As I cleaned up my boys’ room, I couldn’t help but stop, weep, and pray. I prayed for my boys, thanking God that he has given them life and that I get to keep them here on earth with me. I prayed that they would be safe. I prayed that I would be able to hold onto as many memories as my heart could keep.
I prayed for my friend who has already gone through horrific loss in her family. I prayed that she would take comfort in knowing that her young son, who was taken far too soon from her, is now with his dad, who was taken just 6 years ago. I prayed that she would remember how he smelled, how his voice sounded, and how he held his pencil when he did his homework.
I don’t understand such a horrific loss. I don’t understand how one person can endure such pain. I don’t understand why, out of tragedy, we realize how short our time with our kids is.
I will spend most of my day praying for all 4 of my kids and mourning the time that my friend lost with hers.
I will hold them tight when they get home. I will cherish my time with them and try not to let life get in the way. Time matters. I just wish it wasn’t out of tragedy that I realize it.
These 4 are my life.
Posted in Family, Kids, Parenting, Uncategorized
Tagged cry, friend, loss, pain, pray, son, time, timematters, tragedy
One of my best friends just had her baby! I’m so excited that I could just scream! Of course I won’t do that because that would be really scary to a newborn. But it has brought up so many emotions that I felt when my kiddos were newborns.
For example, the smell. I wish someone could come up with a way to bottle that newborn baby smell. I’m not sure what it is, but it is like a drug to me. And what about those sounds? Lip smacking and grunting sounds so cute when it comes out of a precious little one day old.
But it also makes me think of the days when my babies were more than the world to me. When I thought they could do no wrong. When just looking at them made me cry with joy. And why does time make those things fade?
Well, it doesn’t fade. It just changes. Looking back at how I treated my kids when they were newborns makes me appreciate them more now. I used to imagine who they would be in 1, 5, 10 years down the road. Now I love them more for who they have become. For the young adults that they will be. I used to think that I couldn’t love them more than the first time I saw them. Now I know that I love them more as each day passes.
Liz, I know you do and will feel the same love for Quin! You were born to be a mommy and I’m so thankful that Quinley Jean is in our lives! I can’t wait to see the girl that she becomes and the mom that you have been for a long time. Love you both!
Me and Liz on a girl's weekend to LA in 2008. August was in my tummy. So glad my friends can share in a mommy's love!